Remembering Christmas

It's Christmas Day 2013. Twenty-thirteen! I'm not sure I ever really thought about what life would be like in 2013 - seemed way too far in the future. But here I am living in the future.
For the most part, today started like any other day. Devo, breakfast, walk the dog -  but while walking  Bon Jovi, at around 8:00 a.m., kids in the neighborhood were already out riding new bicycles, and riding toys and even a dirt bike on the river bed trail. My mind flashed back to those days when my boys were little and they were outside riding bikes, and/or playing with whatever toy Santa brought. I had to smile.
Back at home after the walk, I shower and get dressed.
Ron is lying on the couch watching a movie on TV.
Matthew is still asleep.
Yep, it seems like a normal day off, except there is a Christmas tree in the living room with presents around it. Not your normal day off at all.
The plan was for Sarah to get here between 10-10:30 a.m. Then eat lunch right at noon, so she could leave to go down to Pete's parent's house for Christmas with them. We were sandwiched in between a few minutes with her mom this morning, and dinner and Christmas with her future in-laws this afternoon/evening. (Next Christmas I think we'll have to plan to celebrate on different days, it will wear them out trying to get to three parents' houses in one day. That would be nuts.)
We all knew she would be late...but I went ahead with the meal prep timeline anyway. The menu is pretty simple this year. There are only four of us.
Ham
Sweet Potatoes
Corn on the cob (new menu item this year instead of mashed potatoes and gravy)
Green Bean Casserole
Salad
Dinner rolls
Apple pie, Christmas cut-out Sugar cookies, and Fudge for dessert.
Simple, but yummy.
Sure enough, Sarah didn't get here until 11:00 a.m. By then the Ham was ready to come out of the oven and brushed with the glaze, the vegetables would go in the oven at 11:30, then return the Ham to the oven after glazing and boiling the water for the corn.
After hugs and hellos, Ron read the Christmas story, from Luke 2. It's a tradition with us, and especially this year since the kids weren't at church Sunday. It's always a good way to keep our minds focused on the reason for the season. The kitchen timer went off... then Michael called. They had finished opening presents already. I talked to all of them for a few minutes, they were happy and excited about their gifts. I hated to cut the conversation short, but I explained we were just getting ready to open presents...
Matthew was happy with his new xbox game, xbox live one year subscription, and gifts cards for clothes, gas, and food.
Sarah was very excited about the LSAT trilogy to study for the test again. Who else would be excited about text books for Christmas? She was also very happy about the Suits, season 3 (which is pre-ordered), and gift cards for clothing, and gas.
We all thought it was weird without Aaron, and quieter, too. (He's coming home Sunday after the Buffalo Wild Wings Bowl game on Saturday).
Ron loved the cologne, Angels baseball tickets, and his annual Franklin Planner refill, but this year he got a new binder, too. He had asked for a hydraulic jack so he could begin working on his car, but I knew he didn't really want a car jack. Later he admitted he liked the Angel tickets and gift cards to Bass Pro and Starbuck's much better. Yeh, I knew that. He's such a kid.
I was excited to open my iPad mini. It's a gift from Ron, even though I picked it out and paid for half of it! But it's what I wanted and it was on sale...I'm excited, but afraid to use it. I want to really like it and be glad I got it. I was also very happy with the necklace and earrings Ron picked out when we met at the mall a couple of days ago. (He should have got only one or the other, not both, but they are beautiful).
Lunch was good and everything was hot, but not over cooked or anything in spite of the fact that I had to keep going back and forth while opening presents to take things out and/or put things in. Fortunately, the table was already set.
Sarah left right after lunch. Matthew played his new game. Ron continued watching the movie on TV. I did the dishes.
We went to see The Hobbit in the afternoon. That's another tradition in our family now. We got there about 45 minutes before the show time. We didn't have to wait in line for tickets, or snacks, or even to get into the theater. And we had pretty much our choice of seats. But we were soon glad we had arrived early, because the theater quickly filled up. I loved this movie. It's my favorite so far in the series, but the ending is driving me crazy. Will I have to wait until next Christmas to find out what happens? (I guess I could read the book).
It was a really good Christmas, and I was more thankful than usual for the presents under the tree - maybe because of the Dave Ramsey Financial Peace class and being conscious of where the money is going. Maybe because of Tina's health challenges (throat cancer) and just wanting to enjoy life every day. Whatever the reason, I am grateful.
Tired from the excitement of the day (and the days leading up to today), we just had leftovers from lunch - which was still awesome. Then settled in to relax a bit on the couch and watch TV.
I still love looking at the lights on the Christmas tree even without any presents, so peaceful.
Merry Christmas to all, and to all a good night.

Senior Night 2013

This is Matthew's senior year in high school. His last year playing football. Wow. The. Last. Year.
So far the season has not been what we anticipated it would be. After practicing all summer, on the night before school started, Matthew dislocated his left shoulder. The same shoulder he dislocated last year. Not good. Unlike last year, when it popped back in 'on its own,' this year they couldn't get it popped back in on the field and he ended up having to go to the ER to get it popped back. It was at least as painful as it sounds. In seven days, I took him to four different appointments - including an MRI and consultations with an Orthopedic surgeon. No doubt about it. His shoulder injury is serious. Two dislocations before age 18 is not good on any level. And the only way to fix it - is surgery. The only way to keep it from popping out again - give up football.
He missed the first day of school. Missed the first day of his senior year! But the bigger question on our minds is what about the football season? That is not as superficial as it sounds. His health and well-being (and education) are our primary concern BUT, this is his last year. He has been playing football since he was 7 years old. He paid his dues as a Freshman (and enjoyed being on the championship team that year). He has endured the grueling schedule of playing both JV and Varsity last year. He has practiced all summer. He has been training and playing for this moment in time for ten years. He has no aspirations for playing at the college level, but he did want his Senior Year. To be at the top. To be one of the best of the best. He has earned it...so all of us, as concerned as we are for his shoulder injury, are grieving the possibility that he won't have a senior season at all.
The decision is his to make.
He's nervous about playing, too. After all, he's the one who feels the pain when his shoulder pops out. But he doesn't want to miss his last year either. He doesn't want to live with the regret (in whatever decision he makes). He's a good player. He's a smart player. And he loves the game. So, in the midst all of the anxiety in trying to decide what to do, we have to get a doctor's clearance to return to practice and playing even before he has the option in deciding whether or not to play.  Seriously, a doctor's clearance stating it's OK for him to return to football when he's already advised against it?...the odds aren't good. Nonetheless, I call the doctor. First, I call his primary doctor, but they refer me to the Orthopedic doctor, who is really the one treating him for this. I explain what I need. They take the information, my FAX number, and my cell number in case there are any questions.
And we wait.
No news on Monday. Senior Night is this week.
If he gets cleared by Tuesday, he can dress out in his uniform for Senior Night. I call back again and explain the Senior Night ... she understood, and told me if I hadn't received the clearance letter by 3:00 p.m., to call again. It came in at 1:00 p.m.
He can return to football. He can suit up Friday night.
That's a long way around to get to Senior Night...

Senior Night is just what it sounds like. It's the night the Seniors, and their families, are recognized. It's a big deal. (And, secretly, I wanted to be the mom for Senior Night). In 2010, Senior Night for Aaron, his grandparents were here. We all lined up in the end zone, Bufford and Mary, Ron and me, and Penelope (Aaron's girlfriend). We waited for Tina (his Mom) to show up. We didn't see her anywhere, but she is usually late ... The time came for the players and families to walk onto the field. Aaron gave me the flowers and gift bag and then offered his arm to his grandma to escort her as we walked. Awesome moment. So, I knew what it felt like to be on the field with your player...your son. Matthew and I have come a long way in our relationship since I married his dad. In fact I never expected to have the kind of relationship with him that I share with him now. We have been through all of the practices and games and injuries and doctor appointments ... and I want to share this night, too. Earlier in the week he had asked if he should invite his mom to Senior Night. I told him that was up to him. (and it was). He asked if she was there for Aaron's. I said, No. He asked, was she mad? I said, I don't know...and I don't know if he asked his Mom or not.
We line up in the end zone. Ron and me, Sarah, and Hannah (his girlfriend), but not Tina. I asked Hannah if she knew whether his mom was coming or not. She said she didn't think so. And then the moment arrived. The time for players and families to walk onto the field. Matthew handed me the flowers, the gift bag, extended his arm and said, "Let's go, Deedge."

Happy Anniversary No. 6

It's Monday, July 1, 2013. We are both off work today, which is cool because today is our 6th wedding anniversary. Six years. Wow! We plan to take a night or weekend trip to a Bed & Breakfast or cabin in the mountains later, but for today we're running errands, and ending with dinner at Outback. One of the errands I want to do is to go to Lumber Liquidators to start pricing wood flooring for the dining room (and living room and entry way). Mostly just to spend the day together...
I enjoyed looking at the clock at various times during the day and remembering what we were doing six years ago at that time.
At 7:30 a.m. six years ago (my wedding day), Ross made Waffles for breakfast (I had been staying at their house the last couple of days, since Ron's parents arrived and were staying at my (our) house.
Today, I made Waffles for breakfast (adding cinnamon and sugar the way Ross did in 2007)
At 9:30 a.m. six years ago, I was getting gas in the car and cash from the ATM.
Today, I was finishing getting dressed after walking the dog and showering.
At 1:00 p.m. six years ago, I had an appointment at May Co. in the Redlands Mall to get my make-up done.
Today, I was getting my allergy shot at the Redlands Beaver Medical Clinic. (just a note, May Co. shut down and the Mall ended up going out of business too and is still vacant).
At 4:00 p.m. six years ago, I was about to walk down the aisle to become Mrs. Ron Bennett.
Today, we were at Lumber Liquidators looking at flooring (very expensive, by the way).
At 6:00 p.m. six years ago, our reception was in full swing and while all of our guests got to eat - we didn't! (we ended up going to Coco's at 8:30 p.m. on the way to our hotel!)
Today, we were at Outback sharing steak, sweet potato, and salad...
...remembering six years ago, looking forward to many more years to come! Happy Anniversary Spa-Man!

Choose Your Attitude...

"You can't choose what happens to you, but you can choose how you react to what happens to you."
I don't know who said that, but I've heard it quoted many times, in many different circumstances ... it's one of those quotes that sounds good and true, but many times (at least for me) very difficult to put into practice  in your everyday life...
Monday, I was exhausted from moving those four truck loads of stuff for the church yard sale. I was frustrated because I hadn't been able to scrapbook all weekend, and no scrapbooking on Monday either because of grocery shopping and other errands... but I did go to the YMCA for my normal step aerobic class at 6:00. Parking since they remodeled a few months ago has been difficult because they've added so many classes and the big swimming complex. There are a lot more people going to the Y and you have to really time when you arrive especially in those after-work hours. I had already driven around the block once, when I came back around, I saw a guy pulling out, but there was someone else in front of me - so figured that one was gone. Then a young lady came out and seeing me waiting, indicated she was pulling out. The guy in front of me pulled ahead past both places. Thinking he was going to back up for the first one, I continued to wait for the girl. Then the person behind me came around and parked in another spot that opened up; and the car behind her whipped into the spot the guy was waiting for. Then when the girl pulled out, he backed up like he was going into her spot - I thought, 'No. You've passed 2 places.' Two people behind me have taken 2 other spots and I'm parking in the spot I've been waiting for. I honked my horn. He got all irritated and got out of his car trying to explain that he had moved ahead to be polite to the person behind me! That person had already parked somewhere else and was not even the person in the place he had supposedly been 'polite' for. I told him no that wasn't what happened....and he told me I was rude. I said, No, I'm not. But I'm parking in my spot now. (And I did.) My action (re-action) to the situation is really an attitude I'm trying to overcome. To calm down. To learn to act appropriately, and not react. So, my workout, after a very frustrating weekend and day off, was not very beneficial, because of the incident.
Wednesday. It's the final day the Homeschool Association is using our building for their end-of-year testing. They return all of the tables and chairs to the rooms borrowed from, lock all of the doors and drop off the key at the office. They also give me a card. Thanking me for my beautiful and godly attitude in helping them...
One week. Two incidents. Two reactions/attitudes. It's all about the perception from the person on the receiving end of the attitude...

Nine Years Ago...

It was a Saturday. I had been single and on my own for about a year. The weekends are always tough when you're single, and all of your friends are married.
I decided to spend the day cleaning out some stuff in my scrapbook room - always an ongoing project. I remember sitting in the middle of the floor, saved memorabilia in piles all around me. Pieces of my life scattered on the floor.
I found a love letter from my ex-husband.
I read it.
I had forgotten all about it.
When did this love die?
I called my daughter-in-law and read the letter to her.
We cried together.
I held the letter in my hand for a while.
Not really wanting to keep it, but not really wanting to throw it away either.
What to do with the pieces of my life?
What to do with the pieces of my broken heart?
A few hours later, I decide to go to the Spa in the apartment complex.
I sat there for several minutes still contemplating and wondering about those pieces of my life...
Then came you.
I wasn't looking for you.
But there you were anyway.
That smile. Those dimples. That southern drawl. (sigh)
Who knew then that you would be the one to put the pieces of my life and the broken pieces of my heart back together again.
Happy Meeting Day, Spa-man! I love you...

Voices on the Phone...

Today is my granddaughter's 5th birthday. I know that because I asked her how old she was going to be when I talked to her on the phone yesterday. I had to ask because I didn't really know what year she was born (though I thought it was 2008). To her I am just a voice on the phone once or twice a year and random Christmas visits to my office. She says thank-you and I love you ... but just because her mom reminds her to say those things. To her I'm just a voice on the phone.
I have spoken to six of my eight grandchildren on the phone in the last 2 weeks. That is amazing. That. Is. Wonderful. Four of them live in Oregon and they know me and I know them very well. But I hadn't spoken with them in a few weeks. I miss them. I called hoping to find them at home and I hit the jackpot - all four were home. I spoke to each one for a few minutes. Just checking in to see how school is going, and to ask what else is happening in their lives. Bevan is looking forward to Dragon Boat Races; Trevor just finished Basketball (his team won the championship) and he's in a new play, "Peter Pan;" Julian, who along with Dawson was recently baptized, said - 'you know you're my sister now, too.' Oh, cool, I said. A sister and a grandma. That. Is. Awesome. And ... Dawson, was on page 183 of an 185 page book he needed to finish and do a book report on. He's also going to a State Chess Competition this weekend. Lots of good stuff happening there.
I spoke with Eric, who just turned 14, when he called to thank me for the birthday card and gift card. He does know who I am - more than just a voice on the phone, because I did get to babysit him and spend more time with him when he was a baby and toddler. A couple of times he said something, then chuckled and it sounded so much like his dad. I miss him, too.
Voices on the phone...I loved hearing each one. They are all different. Their personalities come through the line and I smile and wish I could see them face to face...not just a voice on the phone.